Random

I sometimes wonder, what a huge waste Talent is, when there is no compassion or humility accompanying it.

Desire

I went and got myself a vacuum cleaner today. Much against the strong opposition from my friend, who said she won’t lend me any money this month, if I go on this shopping spree and then go bankrupt.

Vacuum cleaner is not really a vain extravagant purchase, if you think about it from a housewife’s perspective. But why now? I have been staying in the same single room PG with the same roommate for the past three years. The amount of dirt in the room should be the same, or should have reduced drastically as two clean girls reside in the room now, as against before. Did I turn ultra clean with time? That should be a no.

I remember when I first moved to Bangalore, I used to come in after a day of work and sleep in the exact same clothes(I have no clue how I did that). But now I have a separate wardrobe for home wear. I shop for home wear, sometimes much more than I do for my regular clothing. And when I accompany anyone who plans to get a pair of socks for themselves to the neighborhood store. I come out buying quite a lot of unprecedented stuff. Did I turn into a shopaholic? That should be a no. I hope

And there is always ALWAYS something in my mind that I have to get. A new pair of shoes, soap, shampoo, mouthwash. All essentials, all of which I use in good amount everyday. I use everything I shop, I don’t waste or find anything not used at the corner of the shelf. I can’t do without a mouthwash anymore. I have to use a moisturizer before I step out of the house.

What has happened to me? What has changed? Why do I need so much stuff on a day to day basis that I find quite a lot of things missing when I visit home. At home ,I have to run out to get my shampoo and conditioner(yes I have started using a conditioner) , as there is limited shampoo in my home and of course no sign of a mouthwash anywhere. Have I become a ravaging consumer? Why are my needs increasing per day?

And I have a fetish for costly stuff too. I dono where I get this from. My brother has a particular knack of getting gorgeous stuff for unbelievably cheap prices. And my mom still has a pair of earrings she used to wear before my brother was born. It belongs to me now, (those earrings would be cursing their luck.) But I don’t even like getting into a shop that sells second hand stuff or into some mall which has mega sale written all over it. When my neighbor tries to tell me how she could get everything in my wardrobe for cheaper(she is bluffing, I don’t buy that) it rarely ever bothers me .

I got my room a chocolate candle and a potpourri. My bed has some new bed sheets. My teapoy has a clean cute table cloth.

I don’t consider myself irresponsible. It’s not like I spend more than I earn and then repent it. Nope. I am ok with money. Though we should save for a rainy day . There is no point in starving yourself today to have a better tomorrow. So I think I am balanced in that way. Not always, though . (I dono how many friends of mine are going to object to this one)

Then what has changed. Why the vacuum cleaner, why the conditioner, why the potpourri?

My needs have increased. Needs,wants,desires. I look beautiful. I want to look gorgeous. I have a clean room; I want it to be sparkling all the time. I have a decent bathroom,I want it to smell like spring every time I enter it. My expectations have sored up.

We all have an inherent desire to improve. Our life,our surroundings,our clothes, our friends. And this desire when it translates into needs somewhere inspires us to do a lot more in life. It is said that man kind is never satisfied or content. And everyone sees it akin to sin. Lack of contentment. But if everyone is content with what they have and who they are, wont we just be a bunch of lazy people?

Part of our ever increasing desire is just to have a positive change in our life. Shopping is just that, diversity bought into our lives introducing new objects which we might find extremely useful. Which makes our homes or us better. This is why there is retail therapy and this is why shopping helps. As long as we have a grip on the money we spend and don’t have huge credit card bills piled up, I think ever increasing needs should be welcomed as a positive heads up to us evolving as humans

And Without desire, what’s the point in living anyway.


BTW Check out a new blog I loved: I am no jeeves

Loneliness, Epilepsy and other stories

Being alone doesn't mean you are lonely. Now that should be made a proverb, like time and tide waits for no man. And since proverbs should be repeated to become cliché, I repeat-----
Being alone doesn't mean you are lonely

It is sometimes almost delightful to enjoy one’s own company. It’s a pretty big insight for someone like me, who used to skip meals and write absolutely depressing blogs when my roomie went abroad. Read this to know where I come from.

The beauty in enjoying one’s own space is enjoying the independence. Now that’s something I have always loved, though I never really realized it. Just doing your stuff, your way, no adjustments, no distractions. (Lying lazy amidst your own pile of mess doesn’t count).This is one of those rare rare weekends where I have been in my room for the whole day with no movie/restaurant plans. (Had some last minute cancellations, which I didn’t deal with pretty well. Let’s talk about that later!).

It was a simple normal almost boring day but yet I feel like writing about it.

Saturday means no work. Coming from a 24X7 working culture this is heaven for me. Getting my weekends off. I still see people yearn for it, and I am completely grateful that I have it.

I get my 8 hours of sleep. Again WOW! I remember those night shifts and the zombie it made me. So another blessing I just can’t take for granted.

And my alone day began . .
I decided to go for the advanced Yoga class which is conducted on Saturdays. I go for the regular course on weekdays and anyone who has completed 3 months can go for the advanced classes . But when my master asked me to concentrate on my Shiv Kendra or somewhere in the middle portion of my brain, and all I got was a headache from trying to move my eyes there, I knew I wasn’t ready for it. But I did do the asanas better than any of the “advanced” students. . Hehehhe . Yippie to a haughty me. Anyway this means I woke up at around 5:15 a.m and had a good one hour of exercise. That’s a great start for anyday!

I come back catch up on the adorable lovely God given sleep .

I am currently reading Chicken Soup for the Soul. I love it. Truly inspiring and I cry at the drop of a hat, so obviously a tear jerker. I love these stories of growing against all odds. It’s the same way I inspire myself thinking of ShahRukh Khan. With that nose, hair-do and no acting skill to speak of ,he still became the King Khan super star of the Indian film industry . So nothing can stop us from becoming what we want, not even lack of talent.( Don’t get me wrong, I absolutelllllllly ADORRE ShahRukh Khan.)


I have to explicitly thank two people for today. My hostel canteen guy. I just recently discovered that his food tastes good. And it’s extremely cheap and is healthy. I had all my three meals today (It’s a rarity believe me!) and I thank him for the 25 Rupee meals.

I thank my Yoga master. For his wonderful class which is almost charity, when compared to what Yoga teachers charge else where. For a mere 300 Rs he has classes every working day for 3 months. Please treat this as an advertisement for anyone who stays near JP Nagar 2nd phase/ Ragiguda Temple , Bangalore to check this out! You needn’t be trying to lose weight or on the look out for your higher purpose in life or anything of that sort. It’s just absolute unadulterated fun!

Now I have some information to share about EPILEPSY



This is for everyone who has watched too many Indian movies and like 99% of us believe in such myths (Kazhcha and Sargam being two main contenders in the Malayalam movie dept for spreading these notions ).

And this came into mention cause, I recently saw a guy get an epileptic fit in a park, while he was sleeping. And he fell of the bench and the place was a mess. (I actually thought he poisoned himself and he was dying) I ran to the place. And in seconds I saw all kinds of keys. Santro, scootie, house keys, almirah keys all thrust into his hand. Though I didn’t know what to do I knew key holding was just nonsense. I was thinking of calling emergency BUT
1) People said this is “common” and he needn’t be taken to the hospital .
2) They asked him to cling onto anything iron/steel including the gates of the park.

While I was adamant in taking him to the hospital the whole park disagreed with me (other than my unfortunate friend who had to stick by me, thank you!) and then God’s greatest blessing came to my rescue. Google. I asked a friend to google what to do during an epileptic fit and she just called me up and read it out to me. I love techonology and Internet Is God’s greatest blessing to mankind .

So we got him some coconut water and bread and went back to studying (Oh ya we were trying to study in the park!!! All these distractions made sure that didn’t happen).

And believe it or not after the guy regained his senses he returned to the exact park bench and lied down to sleep as if nothing happened. I didn’t know if I had to feel sorry for him.

Anyway next time you see an epileptic fit, you know what to do. And no, there is no need to call an ambulance.

Now food for thought:
Discipline is doing the right thing even when you don’t feel like doing it.
Isn’t that the whole philosophy of the life in a single simple sentence!

P.S: Earthly affairs. Javed Habib Hair studios are great! And I love Gilmore Girls. :-)

Service

Just fresh from reading Arpz's blog.Let me just type out something before the inspiration dies and I slip into my mundane routine.

I have been diligently waiting for this handy laptop to resume blogging.Blogging with no manager shoulder surfing what I am writing. With no fear, and with the ability to publish anything anyday working or otherwise. My employer has thoughtfully given this amazing equipment so that we can work no matter when.I am willing to take that bargain.

What do I write about? Hmmm.. My new job (Its been eight months but since I haven't written about it, I guess I can still call it new) .Ya my new job. It's better than the last one, or I know better now than I did then.
So what do I like about my new job? The timing is great. My shift starts only at 1:30 pm which means even if I do feel lazy in the morning, I still have time for an attitude shift before I miss my cab.My team is small and have dedicated people.My work seems good. Looks like I am doing what I read in a lot of experience columns in job opening emails.
There are no daily thresholds .No over pressure.No boring "escalation-prevention" meetings.
And then the ultimate luxury, we have a room to pray. Now that comes as the biggest blessing for me with our 5-times-a day praying routine.And not having a place in office means I have to finish it all off together . Now that's reason enough to love my job I guess.

So now for the REAL stuff! Something has been cramming me and my roommate's life for these past days . My maid didn't show up for THREE WEEKS! with no prior notice.Due to which all I can think about now is how important she is to me . (Ya ya, I know kannulapol kannite velayariyoola* Read below for translation)

I have heard and read about abuse of maids and how slaves and servants were ill treated in yesteryears and even now. All I can wonder is HOW! How can u ill treat or abuse someone on whose mercy we live.On whose mood swings and cramps our clean clothes and fresh rooms depend.

Me and my roommate have spent quite sometime last week praying, breaking coconuts,Doing Reiki etc etc for her to come back into our lives with clean clothes.As if this was not enough she seems super busy on her return,I have to chase her every morning,always wondering if it would be better if I got her a mobile, I could avoid running around climbing 5 floors searching for her.And then plead to her in my broken hindi about the plight of our room.

After all this I now know why my mom chose not to have a maid all these years.I think dependence is something we all have been escaping from.Now women don't need to depend on their husbands for money, but how many people are we depended upon to get our daily stuff done.If I start writing about my ironwala and the amount of vacation he takes,I could fill up ten other pages.Anyway he works only for about 10 days a month and then he disappears, this especially when all my clothes have been washed(with my maid's mercy) and now I cant wear them cause they are crumbled.

I know that the human society is inter dependant for its services.I get paid when I allocate storage so that the applications can fill it up with data. And I pay these people for providing me with pressed clean clothes and a fresh room.But if my application runs out of space,I get called upon even in the middle of the night to look into it.I provide my service 5 days a week and even on some weekends . I have to plan ages before I take a long leave.There are millions of dollars at stake if my work doesnt get done on time or gets delayed for even a day.

But is it ok if my bathroom looks dirty for few days.Is it ok if my clothes aren't pressed when I want them to be? Is it ok if these people disappear for weeks on end without a warning or a replacement?

I know I shouldn't compare.After all I get paid much more than they do.

If any maid abuser happens to read this, please let me know how you do it. HOW!

P.S: I have heard that my ironwala owns a bungalow somewhere in his hometown and he resides there as a king :)

*"We dont realise the value of eyes when we have it" is the closest translation of this malayalam proverb. If there are any similar english proverbs please let me know

The Return of the blogging

It’s been over four months since I blogged. Elaborating the reasons would be too boring. So I will just stick to a few clichéd words to explain my absence – fear of manager, work, and laziness .Its not that I overcame any of the above today. But the truth, which anyone who enjoys writing would whole heartedly agree with me is that, the urge to write never dies. It comes out in some way or the other. You at least think about writing. Formulate the words in your head. And sometimes these words never find its place in a piece of a paper or in anyone’s heart just cause the thinker was too drowsy to pen it down.

So how has life been for me all these months, In a nut shell with the Grace of God, I have had a wonderful time.
Events/I Realizations that I have had in this span of time are as follows.
1. Rakhi introduced me to the idea of Reiki. Little did I know, how much of an influence it would have in my life when I involuntarily signed up for an attuenement.
2. She got married in the most beautiful ceremony I have ever witnessed.
3. I managed to lose some weight. It was quite some work figuring out what worked for my body and in the process I learned that weight loss is lot like love. It finds you, all you need to do is yearn for good health.
4. My Reiki Master’s husband mentioned about a book The Secret. This magical best seller is a best seller for all the right reasons
5. Gratitude is the most beautiful emotion to have. Being grateful for whatever you possess is a miracle, which brings much more to be grateful for in your life
6. Everything culminates in God. He has his own special way to bring his creations closer to him


I will try and not preach from my next blog onwards. And I promise to blog regularly and very frequently.

Public display

Foreword: People in happy relationships and those who believe in expressing their undying love in front of the world. Don’t read further.

If you are bitter and lonely, please continue. Cause as boring as it maybe. Read it for my sake. For one of your own kin.

Have any one of you ever went for a stroll in the park, and wondered at the number of couples occupying every other bench. By couple I don’t mean the extremely cute senior citizens who have come for similar reasons as me. (Obesity/Cholesterol/Diabetics). Or those married souls who have decided to give their little kids some exercise. By couples I mean LOVE birds. The unmarried people who think they are in loveee. Every time I see one of these “birds” all that I can think of is “DAMN! How the hell did she agree for this nonsense? This is in no way consensual” OR “Cant she balance on her own. Why is her arm tugged around his?” OR plain simple “Even He’s got a girl friend”. That’s all I had to witness in my neighboring park. Arms locked / head on shoulder scenarios, that’s till I visited LAL BAGH.

LAL BAGH- Botanical Garden. Entry fee: Rs 10/head.
It’s the very same garden which gets included by default in our All India excursion trip which is supposed to be part of every professional degree curriculum. And I should say, it is a beautiful place. There is greenery everywhere. And once on a national holiday, I happened to visit the park. It was a pleasure. Kids, foreigners, instant photographs for fifty rupees, cucumber slices with masala powder sprinkled on it and lots and lots of fresh air. So after this heart warming experience, I decided to revisit the place.
Time: 4 p.m Day: Working day. So I was there with a friend deciding on the rate at which I should walk to reduce my kumba.
[Kumba:- that’s a mallu slang for an oversized belly. My friend has a totally different definition for my kumba , which goes as follows
Kumba: The one that goes before Nasia ].
Before I could decide on a rate, I happened to see few very young men gawking at something. Human instinct I followed their line of vision to see.. TRRRRRRRRRR… music.. a couple kissing. Now readers (yes, the two of you) consider me immature, backward or whatever , but I was shocked seeing a lip lock in public. The shock was coupled with two instant realizations .
Realization 1) Film actors/actresses should be drop dead gorgeous. Cause its GROSS seeing normal people kiss.
Realization 2) No matter how remote and lonely you find a place to kiss, unless its behind closed doors, people WILL witness it.

As I relocated my vision with a loud YEWWWWWWWWWWW! And a promise that I would NEVER kiss anyone publicly or otherwise. I noticed this was not an isolated case and the only way I could not see it was to either close my eyes or get out. So I did the second ,murmuring to my friend that I am not entering LAL BAGH again and that they have to increase the entry fee to avoid this.

Location 2) INOX: Garuda Mall . Movie: HallaBol. Friday. First Day First Show (I am suggesting the theatre is pretty crowded) Entry Fee:Rs 150 per head. I sit next to a girl wearing awesome sandals. I wonder what a fortune she would have had to spend for that. She is accompanied by her male friend. Anyway I am more interested in letting my friend know about the Jessica lal murder case and how Shayan Munshi was involved in it (As far I gather, Halla Bol is inspired by this incident). Sometime into the movie and some weird noises made me realize the sandal shoe girl and her male friend weren’t concerned about Ajay Devgan’s resurrected conscience. I screamed YEWWWWWWWWWWW! In my head this time. And I realized its not the entry fee that mattered. Also I couldn’t get out of there, I had a movie to watch.

There is no moral in this story. I was just narrating an incident. I haven’t reached any conclusion or judgment.


I haven’t blogged in a very very long time. Blame it on a new manager. Its fear all the way!

Festive season... it is!

It’s Christmas and I am in office. Work is less, as the rest of the world seems pretty busy celebrating or at least pretending to do so. I get some condolence messages from acquaintances whom I meet online. They seem concerned that I am working on a holiday. I feel sorry for them. Why are they online at this hour? Shouldn’t they be enjoying? I give the usual reply. I am in a shift job. My job requires someone to be here 24X7. And I am on shift now. Blah blah Blah . I spent the Christmas morning deciding whether to eat dosa or idli and looking at families enjoying a well planned picnic in Lal Bagh. Aunties with tucked up sarees trying to emote in the favorite family game dumb c. And me being the self declared fanatic of the game telling my friend how they are doing it wrong .
Long story short I am very much away from family this holiday season. And on New Year’s eve, I would be in my hostel room watching the best program aired in the best channel.(I am blessed with a TV) And wondering if it is essential to kiss someone when the clock strikes 12.
I would get my usual phone calls. And the ever concerned junta would again come forward to extend their condolences when I go about my” I don’t get leaves” self pity speech. I avoid mentioning that I never applied for one. I enjoy, working the entire night. I enjoy, Spending the morning watching others going about their own pursuit for happiness.

Then when do I chose to go home? When the airfares are cheaper. When the world is busy making money. When my manager approves my leave without a second thought.

And when my mom has all the time in the world for me. I go home.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!